sigh. no jobs my family'll complain saying i slack. now that i've so many, God i need You to help me decide which to take you know.. asked Him the whole night trying listen for wad He thinks or says, but i don't hear Him. mushroom just called me up to take her job, and yea the only reason why i'll take it is because of the high pay. but i don't know.. it's quite a commitment. furthermore it might clash with buildbear, i don't even know if i want to stay on already. aunt's place is also asking me back. and i might really want to take up kel's offer at church too. asked Him the whole night already and i still don't know what to do.

great. i just knocked my glass over, spilling milk all over the glass bits. feel so shitty and sick!

1:00 PM

"He did it just for me."

god is gooood. :) stayed over at shu's family chalet since monday and just got home today. then went out again to meet bev and then setting off to join cg for study-play group later :D. so the entire week i was basically out. just when i thought ama called to scold me, miraculously, no i mean, lovingly and favouredly, she asked me to go home for dinner cos she prepared black chicky soup! which is my favouriteee. AW i LOVE AMA. so sweet and god is so cool! i wasn't scolded for bla bla out and all! WOOHOO! :D

hosanna hosanna~
saved indeed. :)

i wanna blog about chalet. on the first night, there were only shu and i in the room! like HOW OFTEN do we get to sleep comfortably during all our slumbers? NEVER. usually we just squeezed like happy sardines on the floor. haha.. watched horror dvd and settled down to a heart-to-heart talk sharing and fellowshipping. last night was crazy. dear fang just broke the news to us. regarding her abortion. twins somemore. we were utterly shocked and . i don't know. maybe traumatised even. we couldn't sleep and demeni got a nightmare. but that was also the time when we opened up and shared our hearts out, being really genuine and honest to one another. God, i'm sooo glad for all of that. though demeni wanted to kill fang and mushroom slammed her with the pillows and shu threw blanket at her, i don't know.. it was just a super m.a.d. night. as usual. FANG LIED!! :O hahahahaha horrible.

but the story is true. a friend of someone we know.GOD IS GOOD! He's a protective Father, keeping us safe in His big big hands. from sunday's message about the ached arm pastor got carrying jessica yet He was pleased, i finally understood for the first time the love our God has for us. :) hosanna hosanna.

4:50 PM

"He did it just for me."

Hosanna

Verse 1
I see the king of glory
Coming down the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes
I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing, the people sing

Chorus
Hosanna, hosanna
Hosanna in the highest

Verse 2
I see a generation
Rising up to take the place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a new revival
Staring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees

Bridge
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

Hosanna

4:47 PM

"He did it just for me."

i am so sleepy at this moment! but i must note these down lest i cannot remember them tomorrow. i hope i won't have to go down to mom's stall tomor. so earlyy. and i want to go for service. collect my books and the Destined to Reign. oh yea midautumn tickets too! must grab them before they're gone. god please i pray that i won't have to go down to stall tomorr.. and you turn everything out for mommy well, that she may rest even when selling. internally and externally. she will have favour with people! which of cos she will, she's a child of god. :)

i have so many things to note down. for myself. oh i noe.

• cousin testi
  
• tuition
• helpme=worship
• coach gary's message
• preparation

too sleepy. zzz. tomor:)

12:48 AM

"He did it just for me."

talking to shu and demeni over msn now.. haha. you guys are so sweet. just when i felt pathetic, they're here. :) and ooh surprisingly, we're all faced with a littlee what's the word.. unexpected situation. or unaccepted situation haha. i treasure this friendship of ours and yea, chalet next week! i hope jesus is present physically. and talks loudly so we all can hear him clearly. hehh. REALLY REALLY. i hope. i blog myself happy cos in the end i always talk myself out of my troubles. buildabear training on thurs! god, thank youuu. :)

12:56 AM

"He did it just for me."

believing is receiving. indeeeed.

no i don't believe to receive. but i believe because i feel that it's right. true and uh huh. TRUTH. hooray. got 2 interviews with rainbow centre and Minds next week. which came just after i ask to quit this part-time. WOW. others don't have to astound like me, because it's only between me and Abba. ymca's sir got back to me regarding attachments today too! i remember the analogy of sticking your foot out into the visible nothing and the other foot out and realising rocks just grew out of the emptiness to support my footing. when i told ama 'it's jesus it's jesus! goodness run after me and not me pursuing them' then she'll go on and nag about no money la, no this no that without jobs. and i still stubbornly quit because i insist on doing what i want. but i really believe, i really believe and i know that god doesn't bless when i secured a good paying job but He blesses me wherever i want to go! I believe i am a blessing because of Christ in me. i want to touch lives and point poor fellows to God too. because He will be their great comfort which money will never match up to. This i really believe.

People with good prospects because of the courses they're taking, to me there is no longer a need for comparison. They have good prospects, and if they're happy, that itself is good news! I know in my daily walk or crawll haha with Jesus/Abba, those very moments can never be bought or earned. my future, i know it's good. but i want to live my moment now. there's only 1 12july07. I thank You Father for picking me as Your daughter. now i know. now i really know, i know why it was planned that i may be brought up by my family, the specific events, the people, the friends, school, studies, play blabla. i remember how much i insisted to get that 3 As. for what reason i don't know. i love to live the moment. perhaps it's because of the rocks that suddenly and specially appear in front of me when i take a step out. In You i have fear no more. :D


CG movie tomor. robots. :l
nevertheless, FELLOWSHIP!

12:07 AM

"He did it just for me."

me.?
love this song.


wow. there's once a period of time when i was absolutely absorbed into blogging. nowa days/months blogging's damn sian. my passion in Him grew fonder and.. it's inexplicable. i do, very much in fact, hope i can convince the people around me about His amazing LOVE, not just in actions and wah-miracle sort of blessings, but LOVE and PROTECTION always.

zouked and drank vodka yet i still remained sober which IS really divine protection. couldn't agree with the lyrics, those don't-you-wish-your-gf-was-hot-like-me. hahaha. funny. don't you think so?
i like mambo most cos of its rhythm and beats but as for the songs.. eh i suggest you pick One Way. the drummings are wayyyyyyy BETTER! listen to it for yourself! :D

OOO DADDYYY i pray buildabear'll hire me! I believe in favour, i believe i'm IN favour and because Your ways are higher than mine i rest in Your plans.. so. let's just wait for the results..

i understand why things were so difficult in the beginning now. i've become stronger in Christ and i feel like nothing can make me lose sight of You like before. i couldn't have learnt and felt and grew so much without standing up from my failures.. i can't say i've become wiserr hahah.. cos i don't know. but i do know that i feel much more prepared for other things that await me, like SIM's business next january, what a brand new year, new school, new friends, new books and syllabus! but the same ole You and value-added me because of You. while i spend this time exploring other interests and jobs, when revelations, blessings, favour fall on me, i'll point to You JESUS! all glory to You to you to you!!!!!

it's so logical that i don't need to tell you about things that You already knew. You are always there with me wad, tell you again for wad. precisely for WHAT REASON? does God even need to know what's going on in our lives? He has so manyy to take care of, to listen to, and argh. it means it's not just God and I but God and His children!!!?? everytime i awoke from my subconscious self-questionaire i'll get damn sian. partly because i don't have an answer for myself, which is quite sad, considering i'm stubborn to take in what others would say. then again, i like to think. philosophy interests me but wadever. if i don't get it i'll just..

CG TOMORROW - it's gonna be a SPORTS-day hehh :)zz

12:04 AM

"He did it just for me."